This title refers to a hilarious skit performed on The Carol Burnett Show as a spoof of those neverending daytime soaps. If you watch one episode and wait a year you haven’t missed anything. However, I have read articles that suggest that they are good training for the professional actor as pages of script need to be memorized in a very short time. Thanks again to my morning radio news I learned that a young man from my neck of the woods has recently left the soap As the World Turns to become a cast member of the primetime series, Friday Night Lights. Since i am unfamiliar with either show, I can only wish Zach Roerig the best of luck in his new role. Some of today’s (and yesterday’s) big names got their starts steaming up daytime television.

• Morgan Freeman
• Marisa Tomei
• Tommy Lee Jones
• Mark Hamill (before he became Luke Skywalker and the animated voice of the Joker)
• Leonard Nimoy (played a drug addict who checked into General Horsepital (oops Hospital…) thanks Mom)
• Demi Moore
• David Hasselhoff (HIM AGAIN… definitely one of yesterday’s so-called stars (sorry if I offend any of my European readers).. grudgingly included… thanks again, Mom… I dunno how she remembers all these so well)

These are of a few of the famous alumni of the suds. Since no one within my reach can think of any others, I will leave it open for further comments. But as I know that none of my regular readers have an undying passion for All My Dingbats, The Young and the Breastless, One Life to Die, or any of the others, I will leave it up to those silent critters from other parts of the US, Germany, Sweden, Canada, and wherever else you may be hiding.

I’m glad you asked.  A rusk is a rectangular, hard, dry biscuit or a twice baked bread, commonly called zwieback.  These biscuits are often used in child weaning.  They also, apparently, go quite well with garbanzos.  The dish plays a pivotal and hilarious role in our fast approaching production of The Nerd.  The cast had their first practice run through the entire piece tonight and except for about a page and a half being jumped over.  It went EXTREMELY well.  Although, a certain nephew of mine could stand to jump on his entrances a bit quicker.  I’m not one to shirk blame since I was beside him and missed telling him of one of his upcoming moments.  But for it being only his second time on stage, he is doing quite well.

I have failed to mention one of my cast mates from  Little Women who has also had limited stage experience.  She plays the role of Clelia Waldgrave, the dim bulbed wife of Warnock (Worncock, Ticky, Tocky, Tacky, whatever his name is) and mother of the precocious Thor.  Clelia has some funny moments herself, not the least of which involves dishes.

One of my other favorite parts is played by that guy who has a name that reminds me of an omelet (not to worry Colorado).  Axel is one of the characters who shares the secret of the show (to find out what the secret is you have to get your reservations in soon).  Some of his on screen antics are sure to bring down the house.  “Hideous pagan ritual” indeed.

So… just over a week to go before our production of Larry Shue’s side-splitting comedy The Nerd makes its debut, be sure to reserve your tickets soon.

While chuckling through one of the daytime serials that my mother insists upon DVRing while she drives the school bus, a newsbreak came on and announced the following: “A little league player is told that he can no longer pitch because he is too good. He throws a 40mph fast ball.” Nine-year old Jericho Scott is like many a young man who enjoys playing baseball in a summer league in Connecticut; however, he finds himself in the middle of a full blown controversy. Opposing teams have forfeited games when they see the pitcher on the mound. Officials for the league have threatened to dismantle Jericho’s team, and either redistribute the players to the other teams, or offer the kids a refund of the $50 sign-up fee. However, Jericho’s coach has not given up and refuses to disband the team.

I suppose there are two ways to look at this. I’m not sure that at nine years of age, I would like to face an opposing pitcher who threw at 40mph. Parents may not want to face the outcome if their child is hit by a ball of such velocity. However, it was reported that Jericho has yet to have his pitches hit even one batter.  Would this not make the opposing teams WANT to work even harder?

If you ask me, the one who is really suffering is Jericho, himself. He misses doing what he loves to do: pitching. Although he has played different positions, should he have to suffer when he has been told that he is really good at something? While thinking about the article, I began to see similarities to Jericho’s dilemma and adults in the work place. Many times, a person is told that he is OVER-qualified for a position because they have received advanced training in the field for which they have applied. Am I correct in assuming that this often boils down to the prospective employer not wanting to pay the person for time learning the trade?

I just think that this is a sad tale and a terrible position in which to place a nine-year-old. Punishing a child because he is “too good” is a horrible message to send to a child.

Ironically, this came to light mere days after a team from Hawaii defeated their Mexican opponents to capture the Little League World Series crown.

Ok… it is official. It seems that every movie FRANCHISE is getting reworked, redone, or the more popular term, rebooted. James Bond, Batman, Star Trek is on its way, and now, The Man of Steel himself (any that I am forgetting?). After Superman Returns failed to live up to the extreme demands of the Warner Brothers bigwigs (apparently the $389 million dollar domestic was not acceptable), it was recently announced that the series would be given a redo. I am not entirely certain what that will ultimately entail. If it means starting completely from scratch with the entire origin story, I am sorry to inform them that there will be thousands of upset fans who believe that the Christoper Reeve 1978 blockbuster was the true take on the beginning of the series. It has also been mentioned that the Last Son of Krypton may be developed into a darker character ala Batman. No thank you. Superman has always been the polar opposite of The Dark Knight. Supes stands proud and tall like the red, white, and blue while Batsy is a character of the night working in the dark shadows and instilling fear in the criminal underworld. Hopefully, the darker tone will refer to the movie itself and leave the character as is. While the most recent film in the franchise did have several problems (the introduction of a boy who is possibly the love child of Superman and Lois Lane being the biggest), I do not see them warranting a total dismissal and a face lift.

Other rumored senseless movies that are rumored to be in the works: BOTH giants of the 1980s horror genre: Friday the 13th and A Nightmare on Elm Street. I don’t think it worked well with Rob Zombie’s re-imagining of Halloween, so why not? ENOUGH ALREADY!!!

You can skip the insanity of the revenge of the killer reboots by renting the originals at Blockbuster.com.

With less than two weeks to go until opening night, I would say that our community theatre’s production of The Nerd is coming along quite nicely.  Today was the first rehearsal during which no scripts were allowed on stage.  For the most part everything went rather smoothly, but of course there were those few “hiccups” as the director called them.  But a large portion of the lines are so incidental that it is really difficult to time and memorize.  There are lots of “What”s, “Excuse me”s, etc that may not seem important but as scripted they add so much to the humor of the piece.  And poooor Rick, I don’t know how many times he has to explain the rules and procedures of a game called “SHOES AND SOCKS.”  One of his FAVORITE parts of the entire play along with his display of musical prowess.  But once again, he is just indescribable.

The gentleman who is playing the role of Willum is also beginning to come into his own.  He brings a nice sense of bewilderment to the scene.  Not sure of what he should do under the circumstances he finds himself under; just trying to make everyone in his home (welcome or unwelcome) happy.

Tansy is growing as she finds herself trying to stand by her man but at the same time becoming really frustrated at Willum’s ineptitude.  She really is like a chicken running loose running from the kitchen to the living room.  I would have a hard time remembering what I need to bring, when I need it, and when to bring it on stage.  Just take a breath and do it.  Above all CONFIDENCE.

So… only 12 more days till curtain.  I know I am not going to be favored by all involved for counting days; but, I would be even more excited if I were on stage. Yet, I am beginning to become secure in my role of helping make sure everything runs smoothly behind the stage (not totally… never that, but adequately so.  More on the remaining cast later.

Earlier tonight, the family and I attended the wedding reception for my cousin who probably is the most adventurous of the entire clan. For instance, the entire affair was located in a field in the middle of nowhere which serves as the headquarters for a group of motorcycle enthusiasts known as “The Dawgs” (wonder where they came up with that name) 😉 Let me just say that the gathering was never dull. I did miss what was sure to have been the highlight of the evening. The bride’s step-mother arrived on the back of a bike in a skirt and other wedding appropriate clothing. The hog was being driven by a gentleman in kilts worn in traditional Scottish style. LuAnn was not sure what she should have held onto during her ride.

While a large number of the guests looked like the stereotypical Easy Rider types: leather vest, boots, jeans, etc. many seemed friendly enough. Somehow, we encountered someone who has a familial tie on my father’s side. This was odd because the wedding was for Stacy, the daughter of my mother’s brother. Then a few tables in front of us sat a gentleman who we THOUGHT was my father’s nephew (obviously, one of those relatives whom I have never before met). The man’s father shared the same name with my uncle who is dead… so definitely not related. Later on, I came across the best man who was laying on top of a picnic table looking like he had been celebrating a little too much too early. However, he chalked it up to indigestion. And I did see a few guys with long beards that looked like they could have been rejects from ZZ Top. OK… moving on.

The best part of the entire gathering was seeing two of my best friends, Britt and Jan, whom I have not seen in probably two years. The strange thing is that they live only like an hour away. So we caught up briefly and B and I both agreed that we were TOTALLY out of our element. I considered inviting them to the game night I was going to attend; however, she felt that she was needed there to help with her step-sister’s reception. That part of the family tree is a loooong story that I probably should not get into on this blog… aaaah, family.

Plus, my cousin from Sandusky commented on my post about the Ghostly Manor.  Apparently, he passes by the haunt quite frequently; however, he and his wife have never braved the interior.  I just dunno why these people who comment in person don’t post in the comment box.  They must be unable to do so while they read the blog while at work.  I also cannot fathom why the people from far away lands don’t comment.  I see on my stats that I get  a number of hits from Sweden, Germany, and other countries.  Surely, something draws their attention or they would not  keep coming back.

Here’s one for your next game of Balderdash. Chopper Chicks in Zombietown. The title alone says it all. A gang of female motorcyclists are the only thing that stand between a horde of zombies who have (acidentally of course) been let out of their secret cave and are heading to a nearby town to wreak havoc. Sounds like a thrill a minute.

This epic, direct-to-video masterpiece was written and directed by one of the masters, Dan Hoskins who was also responsible for that other one great cinematic achievement, Pretty Smart. Both of these must-see extravaganzas have some recognizable names in the cast. In Chopper Chicks, we have Billy Bob Thornton, Lewis Arquette (who has a long list of other acting gigs, most notably guest appearances on tv shows), and Martha Quinn (who many will remember in her days as a founding VJ in the previously mentioned days when MTV still was Music Television). The all-star cast of Pretty Smart includes Patricia Arquette (daughter of Lewis and brother of David) and Joely Fisher.

So for an evening of prime video entertainment or for synopses of “Marvelous Movies” don’t forget the Chopper Chicks protecting us all from the approaching zombies. But be warned, they are NOT readily available from Blockbuster.com nor probably any other retail chain. So if you are one of the select few who own a copy, consider yourself luck?

One of the most beloved stories and movies is about to be presented at one of Ohio’s most acclaimed professional dinner theatres. Beginning August 27, you can join the Carousel Dinner Theatre in Akron as they transport audiences “Over the Rainbow” along the yellow brick road to the land of Oz. This interpretation promises to be faithful in essence to the 1939 cinematic masterpiece but at the same time feature new elements that have never before been seen. One of these is the use of puppets. The press-release also promises an audience interactive as Dorothy enters the Emerald City. As the artistic director, Sean Cercone states:

We (the creative team) have to understand that when the audience comes to see the show, you are entering with a certain expectation of what you are going to see and experience. THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT ISSUES IN DEVELOPING THIS SHOW FOR THE CAROUSEL STAGE.

Indeed, there have to be very few people with access to television, movie screen, or books who have before never encountered the fantasy created by Lyman Frank Baum and first published in 1900. As with any high profile and well-known work, audience expectations will be enormous.

You can follow the creative team on their quest to create their vision of The Wizard of Oz by reading Mr. Cercone’s blog. Plus find ticket information on the theatre’s website.

Catoptrophobia (the fear of mirrors)

Eisoptrophobia (the fear of mirrors or of seeing oneself in the mirror)

After going to see MiRRors with a friend, I was curious to learn the term for the malady and was intrigued to learn that while there is one slight difference, it is enough to have two different phobias. The movie itself was a lot of fun and held your attention once it got going. The plot concerns a former NYPD detective (played by Kiefer Sutherland) working as a night watchman at an abandoned department store in which the mirrors seem to play horrible tricks on people. The most horrible trick involved the lead character’s sister (played by Amy Smart).

My complaints with the experience had nothing to do with the movie itself. It seemed that there was a group of about 10 young high school girls who insisted upon whispering throughout and giggling at the most inappropriate times. There was also a young boy across the aisle who seemed to be more interested in the game on his cell phone than the movie. Yet, these youngsters (who must not enjoy high school football) did not distract too much.

So, if you are in the mood for a decent horror flick that will not put you to sleep (unlike the last one I saw in the theatre that I have dubbed Asleep) look into Mirrors.  Although we were both interested in seeing the movie, taylhis did provide enough of a recommendation to make us want to see it even more.

Enter to win free movie tickets for an entire year on Fandango!

How many of us have ever walked around a retail store in search of an item, give up the search, and ask a store associate for assistance. Ok, admit it… everyone has (or else they are too ashamed to admit it). The other day, a customer approached me. She was not entirely sure if I was working (apparently, the huge cart with crates of milk did not convince her).

“Excuse me, do you work here?”

“Well… I think so.” (I was a bit confused)

She then asked the location of the rice. I tried to be as tactful as possible when I told her that she was standing right in front of it. I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt since her back was turned to it. However, I knew she just wanted to crawl in a hole as she turned around only to come face-to-face with bags of regular rice, boxes of Minute Rice, boxes of Rice-a-Roni, and other variations on a theme.

This reminded me of another incident involving a customer who was having difficulty while searching for an item. I will never forget the time my cousin (who does read my blog) came in and asked if we sold sun-dried tomatoes. I approached the store manager at the time who looked at me with a bewildered expression and asked:

“Why the heck would I carry sun-dried tomatoes? Those would be one of the deadest items I could ever carry. I would be stuck with them for years.”

What a guy, tactful to a fault. Personality though… wet blanket (is that a term?). He was probably right, though; I don’t see sun-dried tomatoes being a big seller in our small store and they would probably sit on the shelf in danger of becoming outdated.

And from a personal observation… do they still make Spicy Guacamole Pringles (Potato CRISPS)? I asked the boss today if we could carry them. They are the best variety of the bunch (much better I am sure than the NEW DILL PICKLE variety). Unfortunately, she looked in her big ordering book and came up empty. Sorry game night fans. Verrry interrrresting… after searching on the Pringles website, I have discovered that the spicy guacamole variety is still around.