Wow.  What a good movie.  The Orphanage is an eerily spooky ghost story, and I don’t really know what else to say about it because I want to make sure not to spoil anything.  They must have felt the same way when they wrote the summary on the back of the dvd’s box because it was very general and even incorrect in some aspects.  The movie is in Spanish, and I’ll admit that scared us away from watching it for awhile.  We got to go out to see a movie together while we were in Florida last January, and we went to buy tickets for The Orphanage, but the worker told us it had subtitles.  So we saw One Missed Call instead, and that wasn’t nearly as good, not even the same kind of movie.  Our movie rental place has a satisfaction guarrantee, so when we told them how unhappy we were with The Fun Park, we got a free rental.  My husband was trying to be quick again – that’s what got us into trouble with The Fun Park in the first place though – so he just grabbed The Orphanage, remembering that we had wanted to see it after reading the glowing reviews from critics.  Pretty soon, it was Sunday already and we hadn’t watched the movie and it was due by 11 pm that evening, so we quickly watched it while the kids were all napping from our big weekend.  It didn’t take long to forget we were reading subtitles rather than watching people talk in the movie; it was that good.  The critics were actually right for once.  Like I said, I really don’t want to give any of the plot because it’d be difficult to explain anything without giving away spoilers.  So I’ll just say, if you like spooky movies, this one is a must-see.  It’s not even really a horror movie; it’s supernaturally suspenseful.  The story draws you in and doesn’t let go…  you may not speak the same language as the characters, but you idenify with them, feel their pain, and genuinely care about what happens to them as the story unfolds.  SEE IT!  It’s a totally different movie experience between the subtitles and just the kind of movie it is – I HIGHLY recommend it! 

Ok… it is official. It seems that every movie FRANCHISE is getting reworked, redone, or the more popular term, rebooted. James Bond, Batman, Star Trek is on its way, and now, The Man of Steel himself (any that I am forgetting?). After Superman Returns failed to live up to the extreme demands of the Warner Brothers bigwigs (apparently the $389 million dollar domestic was not acceptable), it was recently announced that the series would be given a redo. I am not entirely certain what that will ultimately entail. If it means starting completely from scratch with the entire origin story, I am sorry to inform them that there will be thousands of upset fans who believe that the Christoper Reeve 1978 blockbuster was the true take on the beginning of the series. It has also been mentioned that the Last Son of Krypton may be developed into a darker character ala Batman. No thank you. Superman has always been the polar opposite of The Dark Knight. Supes stands proud and tall like the red, white, and blue while Batsy is a character of the night working in the dark shadows and instilling fear in the criminal underworld. Hopefully, the darker tone will refer to the movie itself and leave the character as is. While the most recent film in the franchise did have several problems (the introduction of a boy who is possibly the love child of Superman and Lois Lane being the biggest), I do not see them warranting a total dismissal and a face lift.

Other rumored senseless movies that are rumored to be in the works: BOTH giants of the 1980s horror genre: Friday the 13th and A Nightmare on Elm Street. I don’t think it worked well with Rob Zombie’s re-imagining of Halloween, so why not? ENOUGH ALREADY!!!

You can skip the insanity of the revenge of the killer reboots by renting the originals at Blockbuster.com.

Here’s one for your next game of Balderdash. Chopper Chicks in Zombietown. The title alone says it all. A gang of female motorcyclists are the only thing that stand between a horde of zombies who have (acidentally of course) been let out of their secret cave and are heading to a nearby town to wreak havoc. Sounds like a thrill a minute.

This epic, direct-to-video masterpiece was written and directed by one of the masters, Dan Hoskins who was also responsible for that other one great cinematic achievement, Pretty Smart. Both of these must-see extravaganzas have some recognizable names in the cast. In Chopper Chicks, we have Billy Bob Thornton, Lewis Arquette (who has a long list of other acting gigs, most notably guest appearances on tv shows), and Martha Quinn (who many will remember in her days as a founding VJ in the previously mentioned days when MTV still was Music Television). The all-star cast of Pretty Smart includes Patricia Arquette (daughter of Lewis and brother of David) and Joely Fisher.

So for an evening of prime video entertainment or for synopses of “Marvelous Movies” don’t forget the Chopper Chicks protecting us all from the approaching zombies. But be warned, they are NOT readily available from Blockbuster.com nor probably any other retail chain. So if you are one of the select few who own a copy, consider yourself luck?

Catoptrophobia (the fear of mirrors)

Eisoptrophobia (the fear of mirrors or of seeing oneself in the mirror)

After going to see MiRRors with a friend, I was curious to learn the term for the malady and was intrigued to learn that while there is one slight difference, it is enough to have two different phobias. The movie itself was a lot of fun and held your attention once it got going. The plot concerns a former NYPD detective (played by Kiefer Sutherland) working as a night watchman at an abandoned department store in which the mirrors seem to play horrible tricks on people. The most horrible trick involved the lead character’s sister (played by Amy Smart).

My complaints with the experience had nothing to do with the movie itself. It seemed that there was a group of about 10 young high school girls who insisted upon whispering throughout and giggling at the most inappropriate times. There was also a young boy across the aisle who seemed to be more interested in the game on his cell phone than the movie. Yet, these youngsters (who must not enjoy high school football) did not distract too much.

So, if you are in the mood for a decent horror flick that will not put you to sleep (unlike the last one I saw in the theatre that I have dubbed Asleep) look into Mirrors.  Although we were both interested in seeing the movie, taylhis did provide enough of a recommendation to make us want to see it even more.

Enter to win free movie tickets for an entire year on Fandango!

Of course you do, who doesn’t?  Besides, it’s Friday night, and you’re at home reading my blog!  😉  I guess you could be reading this at a later time…  But anyway, if you’re around my age or older, then you remember Molly Ringwald, a popular actress in the 1980’s from many teen-themed movies such as Pretty in Pink, Sixteen Candles, and the iconic The Breakfast Club.  If you were a fan of these movies as a teen or young adult yourself, you will probably feel old when I tell you that Molly Ringwald is playing a grandmother in her next role.  That’s right – grandma.  A woman whose kid has a kid.  Sigh.  While we’re on the subject of feeling old, I read an article the other day that had some interesting facts about the lives of students entering college this fall.  Each August for the past 11 years, Beloit College in Beloit, Wis., has released the Beloit College Mindset List.  It provides a look at the cultural touchstones that shape the lives of students entering college.  For these students, Sammy Davis Jr., Jim Henson, Ryan White, Stevie Ray Vaughan and Freddy Krueger have always been dead.  Here is some food for thought with the rest of the list:

1. Harry Potter could be a classmate, playing on their Quidditch team.
2. Since they were in diapers, karaoke machines have been annoying people at parties.
3. They have always been looking for Carmen Sandiego.
4. GPS satellite navigation systems have always been available.
5. Coke and Pepsi have always used recycled plastic bottles.
6. Shampoo and conditioner have always been available in the same bottle.
7. Gas stations have never fixed flats, but most serve cappuccino.
8. Their parents may have dropped them in shock when they heard George Bush announce “tax revenue increases.”
9. Electronic filing of tax returns has always been an option.
10. Girls in head scarves have always been part of the school fashion scene.
11. All have had a relative–or known about a friend’s relative–who died comfortably at home with Hospice.
12. As a precursor to “whatever,” they have recognized that some people “just don’t get it.”
13. Universal Studios has always offered an alternative to Mickey in Orlando.
14. Grandma has always had wheels on her walker.
15. Martha Stewart Living has always been setting the style.
16. Haagen-Dazs ice cream has always come in quarts.
17. Club Med resorts have always been places to take the whole family.
18. WWW has never stood for World Wide Wrestling.
19. Films have never been X rated, only NC-17.
20. The Warsaw Pact is as hazy for them as the League of Nations was for their parents.
21. Students have always been “Rocking the Vote.”
22. Clarence Thomas has always sat on the Supreme Court.
23. Schools have always been concerned about multiculturalism.
24. We have always known that “All I Ever Really Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten.”
25. There have always been gay rabbis.
26. Wayne Newton has never had a mustache.
27. College grads have always been able to Teach for America.
28. IBM has never made typewriters.
29. Roseanne Barr has never been invited to sing the National Anthem again.
30. McDonald’s and Burger King have always used vegetable oil for cooking french fries.
31. They have never been able to color a tree using a raw umber Crayola.
32. There has always been Pearl Jam.
33. The Tonight Show has always been hosted by Jay Leno and started at 11:35 EST.
34. Pee-Wee has never been in his playhouse during the day.
35. They never tasted Benefit Cereal with psyllium.
36. They may have been given a Nintendo Game Boy to play with in the crib.
37. Authorities have always been building a wall across the Mexican border.
38. Lenin’s name has never been on a major city in Russia.
39. Employers have always been able to do credit checks on employees.
40. Balsamic vinegar has always been available in the U.S.
41. Macaulay Culkin has always been Home Alone.
42. Their parents may have watched The American Gladiators on TV the day they were born.
43. Personal privacy has always been threatened.
44. Caller ID has always been available on phones.
45. Living wills have always been asked for at hospital check-ins.
46. The Green Bay Packers (almost) always had the same starting quarterback.
47. They never heard an attendant ask “Want me to check under the hood?”
48. Iced tea has always come in cans and bottles.
49. Soft drink refills have always been free.
50. They have never known life without Seinfeld references from a show about “nothing.”
51. Windows 3.0 operating system made IBM PCs user-friendly the year they were born.
52. Muscovites have always been able to buy Big Macs.
53. The Royal New Zealand Navy has never been permitted a daily ration of rum.
54. The Hubble Space Telescope has always been eavesdropping on the heavens.
55. 98.6 F or otherwise has always been confirmed in the ear.
56. Michael Milken has always been a philanthropist promoting prostate cancer research.
57. Off-shore oil drilling in the United States has always been prohibited.
58. Radio stations have never been required to present both sides of public issues.
59. There have always been charter schools.
60. Students always had Goosebumps.

I hope I didn’t depress you, but remember, it’s not my list, so blame Beloit College and Molly Ringwald if you feel like an old geezer.  Why don’t we just forget about the list and toast our recycled bottles of Coke to life experience.

Hmm, I couldn’t figure out how to make one of the R’s in Mirrors backward like they do for the movie title, but anyway, we saw the movie Mirrors with Keifer Sutherland yesterday.  It was between Mirrors, Tropic Thunder, and The Rocker.  We eliminated The Rocker from the selection because it didn’t look or sound very good, and the only reason we were interested in seeing it is because it stars Rainn Wilson, none other than the hilarious character Dwight Shrute on our favorite show, The Office.  We ended up going with Mirrors over Tropic Thunder because we were at the nice theater, and we figured a horror movie would give us more bang for our buck so to speak – take advantage of the larger screen and the nicer sound.

Mirrors is kind of lengthy for a horror film; it runs about 2 hours.  It didn’t drag for me at all, well, maybe a little, but only because baby Christopher decided to poopie during the movie and he needed his diaper changed.  So I was like, when is this going to be over so I can change him because I don’t want to miss the movie.  It was a cool premise: Keifer Sutherland plays an NYPD cop who accidently shot and killed another cop, so he still has some psychological bruises and can no longer be a cop.  He gets a job as a security guard at an abandoned department store that had had a fire and burned – right up my alley; I really like abandoned buildings, defunct amusement parks, etc.  The department store was cool looking, and throughout the movie, there were lots of shots of the outside as well as the inside.  I kept wondering if it was an actual building they used for filming or rather a specially built facade…  But anyway, the department store is haunted and the haunting ghoul uses mirrors to do its haunting and murdering.  There is actually more to the plot, but I don’t want to risk spilling any spoilers because it was a decent horror movie and worth seeing.  We were alone in the theater, and when my husband left to go to the bathroom, I was pretty creeped out, so I’d say it was spookily successful.  Before we saw the movie, I had read that the director, Alexandre Aja, is one of a group of directors a horror movie magazine called, “The Splat Pack” for their affinity for blood and gore.  The movie was not without blood and gore, but it was not over-used; something that gets on my nerves with many modern horror films – see #’s 1,2, and 5 on my movie stinker list – (The Devil’s Rejects, Doomsday, and The Fun Park) – all terrible movies showcasing the over-usage of gore.

If you like horror movies, Mirrors is worth a try.  We liked it and were entertained, despite it having a few obvious plot holes…  but then again, what horror movie doesn’t have plot holes?

With the exception of Thinner, I’ve liked most of the Stephen King movies I’ve seen.  My favorite is Storm of the Century, a Prime-Time Emmy Award winning made-for-tv mini-series that aired in 1999.  Every winter when a big blizzard is predicted in our corner of Ohio, we plan on being snowed in watching our Storm of the Century dvd.  It never happens though; I think it has to do with trying to watch a 240 minute movie that’s not for kids when we have 4 of them.  But anyway, if we ever get time to watch Storm of the Century in the near future, I’ll definitely blog more about it – it’s awesome!

One of Stephen King’s lesser known films, Sleepwalkers, is a movie I saw as a teenager.  I liked it back then, so when I happened to see the dvd on the library’s shelf the other day, that’s what I quickly picked up since I was in a hurry.  My husband and I watched it the other night, and we both had the same opinion.  A fun little horror film, nothing great but still entertaining.  It is Stephen King-creepy, as only he can do, and much of the movie’s creepiness has to do with the mother-son relationship; I won’t go into detail except to say that it’s extremely disturbing.  Brian Krause and Alice Krige play the mother and son monsters who need to feed on a human virgin in order to survive.  They morph into strange cat-like creatures, which is even more strange because cats are drawn to their house, yet deadly to the monsters at the same time.  The special effects are extremely cheesy by today’s standards and even laughable, but sometimes I’m a sucker for that kind of thing and really enjoy bad special effects – my favorite example of this is Jaws 3-D.

While we’re on the subject of Stephen King, as I mentioned, I like most of his movies that I’ve seen.  I tried to read the book Carrie a really long time ago, but I found it hard to follow, either because I was a teen or because of the religious ramblings inserted throughout the book which were done in such a way that it’s hard to follow because it’s depicting Carrie’s mother’s craziness.  But anyway, Stephen King is very talented, of course.  He has a gift of making movies extremely creepy without stooping as low as many of today’s horror movies do with the constant blood and gore.

An interesting event took place in his life that almost reads like one of his novels, well, actually it does since he wrote about it.  On June 19, 1999, his life was changed forever when he was hit by a car while walking down a Maine road.  There are two creepy coincidences about this incident.  First, earlier that year, King had finished most of From a Buick 8, a novel in which a character dies after getting struck by a car.  Second, the driver of the car, Bryan Smith, who was only 43, was found dead in his trailer just over a year later of an accidental overdose.  He was found dead on Stephen King’s birthday, September 21.  The accident was inspiration for the Dark Tower series of books, and King is in talks with Lost co-creator J.J. Abrams to do an adaption of the series.  Since I’m a fan of Lost and Stephen King, that might be something I’ll have to check out.  Until then, I’ll probably be planning another snowy viewing of Storm of the Century this winter that won’t come to fruition.

Tonight, I rented the DVD of a musical I have heard so much about but have never had the opportunity to see in any form. Stephen Sondheim’s masterpiece, Sweeney Todd – The Demon Barber of Fleet Street has all the makings of not musical theatre but an operatic tragedy. It tells the tale of a barber, Benjamin Barker, who was wrongfully accused of a crime and sentenced to fifteen years in prison. The evil Judge Turpin was in love with Benjamin’s wife Lucy and had the barber put away so he could have the woman to himself.

As the movie opens, Benjamin (who has assumed the identity of Sweeney Todd) returns to Victorian era London aboard a sailing ship upon which he meets the young Anthony. While the title character was away, his daughter Johanna became the ward of the sadistic judge. Sweeney opens a new barber shop above the pie shop of one Mrs. Lovett who is known around the city for making “The Worst Pies in London.” It is in this barber shop where Mr. Todd plots to take his revenge against the man who sent him away while helping to keep Mrs. Lovett’s business thriving.

The aforementioned tragic character, the young lovers, and in particular the score itself is much more reminiscent of opera. The dark tones set by the entire piece is unlike most light musical theatre. In fact, audiences must be warned of the large displays of blood…. definitely not the “raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens” type of show. However, for those who can look beyond the obvious, what is left is well worth watching. Sondheim composed not only the music but the lyrics to some of his most beautiful songs in Sweeney Todd. “Pretty Woman“,”Not While I’m Around “, and “Johanna ” (one of my favorite Sondheim pieces) are three of the memorable tunes.

As for the marquee attraction, Johnny Depp who has had a looong standing cinematic relationship with director Tim Burton, was adequate in the role. His singing is better suited for a rock band then a musical stage production. Helena Bonham Carter had some of the more difficult songs to sing as Mrs. Lovett (who one could say is perhaps as villainous as anyone in the show). I was also pleased with the voice of Jamie Campbell Bower as Anthony. In perhaps the closest moment of comic relief, Sacha Baron Cohan plays a scam artist named Pirelli who knows something of Sweeney’s past (those of you who know me KNEW I had to mention this bit that looks like a lot of fun).

Would I recommend this musical to everyone? Definitely not! As I said before, if you can look beyond the the blood, what is left is one of the best shows Sondheim has yet created. Sometime, I have been promised to watch a video of a stage performance with Angela Lansbury (who was the original Broadway Mrs. Lovett).

Sweeney Todd – The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street (Vocal Selections) Music and Lyrics by Stephen Sondheim (1930-). Songbook for voice and piano. 44 pages. Published by Alfred Publishing. (AP.VAL2020A) See more info…

Thus sums up the life of John McClane the anti-hero of the four action packed Die Hard films. The latest (I can’t believe I have not seen it before now) Live Free or Die Hard could as easily gone with its working title of Die Hard 4.0. NYPD senior detective John McClane (played as always by Bruce Willis) is aided by a twenty-something computer genius to stop the evil plans of a cyber-terrorist group to totally disable the nation’s computer infrastructure. Led by another computer genius (Timothy Olyphant) with a chip on his shoulder, the villains succeed in taking control of much of the East Coasts transportation, finances, and utilities. This is a three-pronged plan called a “fire sale.”

Next to the original, this is the most interesting and action-packed episode of the bunch. There is a mixing of the old school philosophy of shoot ’em up and pick the bad guys off one by one with a snide one liner (McClane’s signature line “Yipee-ki-yay, _____ is muffled in a key sequence). However, the addition of the detective’s reluctant assistant (played by Justin Long, the “Apple Guy”) brings a touch of new school action as the duo attempt to stop the nefarious scheme.

While the first two films centered the action around Christmas, this adventure takes place on the 4th of July holiday, convenient when most of the government is off. Speaking of the government, it always seems that in these movies, the federal agents are portrayed as nitwits who always call in the local law enforcement to handle the catastrophe at hand.

The best thing to me about the series is that there is no hiding the fact that Bruce Willis ages between films. He is no longer the spry actor he was when he saved his estranged wife from the huge skyscraper in the original Die Hard. He is bruised and battered but still keeps ticking especially when something personal is at stake.  McClane is not disposable and not needing to be replaced with a fresh face every other film.

The action pieces are not bad, either. There is sooooo much going on this time that not two minutes go by when along comes another cliffhanging moment. Cars flying at you in a tunnel, seemingly defeated villains popping back up for one more slug-fest. My favorite involves a police car doing battle with a machine-gun firing helicopter. Not to mention the antagonist’s frustration at McClane’s apparent immortality.

So, action fans should not be disappointed in the latest installment of this entertaining series.

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Twenty-one movies, twenty-one femmes (at least). One marriage, one faux-wedding, several suggestive names. Some brighter than others. One actress an Oscar Winner who ALMOST had her Bond character spun off in a series of her own. By following the link you can get a glimpse of ten of the Best Bond Women and continue on to rank them in order of your preference. HOWEVER, I would like to take a moment to list my nominees for the WORST Bond Women. PLEASE, feel free to comment or include your choice. Or you can also add suggestions for the best. I can think of one that should have been listed.

• May Day & Stacy Sutton (both from the forgettable A View to a Kill. Grace Jones played the statuesque henchwoman of psychopath Max Zorin and former Charlie’s Angel Tanya Roberts played one of the least memorable bombshells)
• Agent Mary Goodnight (dumb name for a dim witted Secret Service agent in The Man With The Golden Gun)
• Dr. Christmas Jones (from The World Is Not Enough. Would anyone believe that Denise Richards could ever convincingly portray a nuclear physicist? The last line of the film is pricelessly dreadful. “I’ve always wanted to have Christmas in Turkey.”)
• Bibi Dahl (Olympic ice skating hopeful in For Your Eyes Only played by Lynn-Holly Johnson fresh from her starring role in Ice Castles. Total blonde eye candy. MUCH TOO YOUNG for the 54 year old Roger Moore. She was seen continuously throwing herself at him; thankfully, 007 kept his distance.)

I realize that the common concensus is that most Bond women ARE indeed eye candy but there have been many notable exceptions