Today we are receiving more winter weather today. While the temperature has warmed up, we are getting more snow and a possibility of more freezing rain. With me having to drive to Toledo tomorrow. I hope the weather clears up before I need to leave.

Rain, snow, and other freezing stuff. I guess I am glad that there will most likely be a white Christmas. More fun and games, at least I don’t have to drive to work at 6:00 in the morning.

Sounds like the freezing rain has started. We will see about tomorrow.

I’ve been thinking of some hot winter beverages, be they spiked, spiced or just hot. Things I like, but generally limit to the winter months (I drink hot tea and coffee all year round). So here is my list, if you want recipes, I can dig one or two up.

Hot Chocolate: I don’t really care how you make this. You can use an instant mix, or chocolate and warm milk, all is good. Especially with whipped cream or marshmallows. For something a bit different, I usually add some mint extract. Or maybe some mint schnapps.

Hot Spiced Cider. I will drink this in the fall when cider becomes more available. But I like it all winter long.

Hot Spiced, Spiked Cider… same as above but with a jigger of Captain Morgans.

Hot Mulled Wine Good stuff when done properly.

Hot Lemonade. I’m not sure what started this, but it sometimes hits the spot when coming in from the cold. Also hot sweet orange juice. The orange juice is good with some Amaretto added.

And Kahlua, coffee and cream.

I just noticed, I may be a bit of a lush when it comes to winter drinks. But I usually only get the Cocoa and hot lemonade. 🙁

Five years ago this evening, my second youngest daughter celebrated her 16th birthday. It was the last birthday dinner with her mother, and our last evening out as a family with her. That dinner was no my daughters pick for a favorite place to eat, but it was close, and we had some gift certificates to go there. Money was tight at that time, with all the bills and extra gas that was used for trips back and forth to Toledo. It was a place we could afford. Not exactly what you want for a sweet 16 birthday, but it was the only thing available. I was sorry at the time, but I couldn’t put it into words for my daughter.

Today that same daughter turned 21. The family left at home went out for her birthday again. She brought along her fiance. It was a better dinner, at least it was a restaurant she chose. With others in the family we went out for Pizza last Sunday, also her choice. I’m hoping the 21st birthday was better than the 16th.

Here is to my latest 21 year old. I hope you had a happy birthday, and wish many more for you. Love you bunches.

It started with the Billy Joel’s “Piano Man” in the car this evening. Darling youngest wanted to hear the whole thing, but we need to get out of the car.

So here I am finding old songs and listening to a few tunes.

Anyway there are a few Beatles songs that just hit a certain part of my being… This one hit tonight..

The Beatles “I Will”…

Who knows how long I’ve loved you
You know I love you still
Will I wait a lonely lifetime
If you want me to–I will.

For if I ever saw you
I didn’t catch your name
But it never really mattered
I will always feel the same.

Love you forever and forever
Love you with all my heart
Love you whenever we’re together
Love you when we’re apart.

And when at last I find you
Your song will fill the air
Sing it loud so I can hear you
Make it easy to be near you
For the things you do endear you to me
How you know I will
I will.

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Just one song that brings back so many memories.

5 years ago at this time, my wife was spending her time at her parents. This is 1 hour away from our home, her husband and 3 of her daughters. On the nights we couldn’t visit, we had to make do with phone calls.

It was also at this time that I took one of the afghans she made to provide a bit more warmth while sleeping. I woke up early this morning under that same afghan. My early morning mind was thinking of how it was like being wrapped in a hug. I guess in a way it was.

Yes, I’m watching the Back to the Future trilogy. Fun little group of movies. But what I want to talk about is time travel and the little word ‘if’.

If you could go back and change something, would you? These thoughts have been in and out of my mind for the past 5 or so years. There are times when I would want to go back and try to change things. But I’ve always had the feeling that things would change for the worse. Kind of like the Back to the Future II. Change one thing and oops there goes everything else. Would it work like that. Most likely.

So knowing I couldn’t change anything that would make any changes. What about little things? Sure wish I could at times. Little things like being a better husband, a better son, a better father. What would it take, and what would that change?

Things going through my mind at this time. Changes to make or be made. I guess that is really the question. Every time I think about changing the past, I start thinking about changing the future. things I can change to be better than I was in the past. Worth while investment in time that. Instead of wondering about the what ifs, maybe I should wonder about the what wills. What will I do tomorrow, next week?

Food for thought.

Those days between Thanksgiving and Christmas were a blur. Seemed like non-stop travel from home to hospital, or home to in-laws. When my wife was released and scheduled for cancer treatments, she had to stay within an hour of the Ann Arbor Hospital. Our house did not meet that restriction, so she stayed with her parents. So between work (we still weren’t accepting the forgone conclusion), taking care of the girls we would drive to see her often. Ann Arbor is about 2 hours away, her parents 1 hour. That meant a lot of time in the car. Often in very poor weather. It became a blur. Very few days stick out in my mind. I remember the blur.

The stretch of 23 between Toledo and Ann Arbor has been in my nightmares. I saw that road too many times during that month. I’ve had dreams of car crashes, getting lost or stranded on that section of road. It was not a road I traveled often before that November/December, but it became one to avoid if at all possible. It brings up memories of the Blur.

Many things to be thankful for. Good Friends, family, wonderful daughters, decent health, and a decent steady job. The job of course means food on the table ect.

But there are times I don’t feel like giving thanks. I just want to hide out for a few months until this winter holiday season is over. Feeling kind of like Scrooge and “People that go about with Merry Christmas on their lips should be boiled in their Christmas pudding and buried with stake of holly through their hearts.” I’m not sure if that is an exact quote from the book, but it was very close to what I heard in at least one movie.

“A Christmas Carol” is not about the day of Thanksgiving, but it takes place on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing day (set in London, so they have that). There are a few holiday shows that deal with Thanksgiving. There is a Peanuts (Charlie Brown/Snoopy) Thanksgiving show, of course. I think they covered every major holiday.

But the one I am thinking of, most people would agree that it is a Christmas Story, but it starts on Thanksgiving day. That favorite holiday classic “Miracle on 34th Street”. I’m partial to the 1947 version, but the 1994 version isn’t too bad. There were a few made for TV versions that were not quite up to either theater version. Drunk Santa on Parade float replaced by the real article for the annual Thanksgiving parade. The start of the Christmas Shopping season.

Hmm, now I know with both the Christmas Carol and Miracle on 34th street, the commercialization of Christmas has been going on a long time. Scrooge complained about people spending more than they could afford just to make merry on one day. Of course the whole Santa being against the commercialization in 34th street was again showing it for what it was.

This Friday is known as Black Friday. A day when retail stores finally see a profit (I’m skeptical on that, but I just spend the money).

Well for me, I don’t do that much. A few nice gifts and that’s about it. I try not to break the bank (do that too much during the rest of the year).

So I guess for me and from me, I wish you the best this Holiday season. From Thanksgiving day to New Years Day, there are Holidays a plenty for those of all faiths, or no faiths. The very best to you and yours. To those reading this blog who have lost a special someone, may you find some peace and hope amid the additional stress this season puts on you.

I still like toys, especially the radio control type. I have a small helicopter but the rechargeable battery will no longer hold a charge. It was a nice little toy that I could fly around the house. Kind of miss being able to fly it around.

I’ve had larger flying toys, but they generally required a lot of room to be able to run. Some needed very good weather to fly. Very calm winds were essential, or you could not control the aircraft. Some like kites required a decent breeze to fly. Powered or un-powered, these were a little escapes from gravity. Fun toys

At one time I knew someone who flew a plane. I went up in a small plane a couple of times. It was a great experience. I was also able to fly a few times in commercial aircraft. This was not as fun as the small plane, you just couldn’t see the as much out the windows.

I would like to try hang-gliding, a balloon or even a blimp, but these are things that can wait.

Doing a very good job on something, be it job or hobby related. Those are flying to me.

I have other flights of fancy that I can think of. Things that have nothing to do with flying. Watching my girls grow up. Just as much of a high. Helping friends and even people I don’t know can also be a flight of fancy.

The stage, computers, my daughters, family all fuel my flights of fancy. This is were my flying takes me.

I don’t usually care for Christmas music before Thanksgiving. A little quirk of mine, true, but a quirk all the same. Tonight it was a little different. Family and friends (and a whole bunch of other people) got together for a dinner and show. It was a fund raiser for the High School Show choir, so the meal was exactly what I expected. The show itself, while way too short, was wonderful for me.

Can a father be more proud? Watching my youngest perform in the show choir was an experience I will not forget. The rest of the show choir was good too. My view was a bit biased. I had eyes for one lovely young lady. I would love to describe the show but words about that escape me.

What I do remember is a show from 5 years ago. Two other daughters performed in another dinner/music show. While not the show choir, it was another wonderful show. It was also the last show my wife saw any of her daughters in. Early the next week she was in the hospital. Two weeks later, we were told things were very bleak.

This is where my thoughts tend to go this time year. It can be very difficult to go to these events when my thoughts turn in this direction. I really wasn’t thinking of it when it started, it just kind of flowed with the evening. Sometimes I wonder how long this will happen to me. At least I don’t break down and cry now. That doesn’t happen much anymore, just kind of a sad feeling. I guess that is better. It could be worse.

I have four beautiful, talented daughters and it is wonderful to see them in whatever they do. Tonight was no exception, even with my melancholy.