School Picture Guy- a recurring guest star in Lincoln Peirce’s comic strip Big Nate, a strip nearly as old as the Simpsons.  He doesn’t appear much these days in his primary role meaning I had to go back to 2007 to find this one, skipping past roles as a deejay and a news photographer.  But weren’t school pictures in the fall you ask?  You are correct.  However, graduation pictures are apparently the currently happening thing.  Armed with equipment photographers never had when I was in school- a digital camera and color printer for instant samples to be exact, the photographers (there were two) invaded the gym space at the school I subbed in today.  Ordinarily this would be a sidebar, but since I was subbing for a gym teacher this became quite important.  In fact, two of the three gym teachers were out.  If you would be guessing by now that I was at a middle school you would again be correct.  Due to the pictures, an otherwise ordinary day became a lot more interesting.  Think of a middle school gym with room for a basketball court and pull-out bleachers.  Reduce this image by half, the amount of the gym in use by the photographers.  Now cram three classes of 30 plus each into this one side.  Now add two dozen dodgeballs into the mix and you can see what made this day interesting.  The sixth and seventh grade kids got to play backboard bombardment (AKA basketball dodgeball) on this special day where only one of the teachers was their real teacher and half the gym was otherwise occupied.  The rules had to be slightly modified though due to an abnormal playing field- one side was deeper than the other to keep the baskets/backboards equidistant from the “center” line (remember the space for the bleachers when pulled out?)- and the number of kids playing- 45+ per team.  Hence, the catch rule was discarded so no getting out by having your ball caught because we couldn’t keep our six eyes on the backboards, students getting hit, and the throwers of caught balls so something had to give.  Everyone had fun though.

How about eighth grade?  Well, for some reason the school designated gym time as picture taking time, though students came in other periods as well during their tutorial periods if they had them since there were far too many eighth-graders to get them all done in their two gym periods.  So, no dodge-ball for them.  Instead they just sat and chatted, and so did we.  The one real gym teacher took care of sending the kids to the photographers as needed.

Gym aside, I had a similar experience today as I did last week.  Last week, two Sundays ago, I had told a boy that one day he might see me in his classroom.  Three days later, there I was, in his classroom. 🙂  This last Sunday, I ran into a former student of mine and mentioned that I had seen no sign of him last time I was at his school and subbed for sixth-grade math, meaning he must have had the other math teacher.  So naturally two days later I had him in gym right at the start of the day!  I should keep doing this, but of course now that I realize the connection it won’t work anymore. 😉

So what will tomorrow bring?  Who knows- I’m still trying to find a job.  That’s how it goes in a sub’s life…

Wednesday was one of those specials days. That is, subbing for a gym teacher. But first, let me talk about the days before this one. Monday, I took a full day job at one of the furthest schools from me. It was a bit of a mixed bag as well as a slight disappointment. I knew this was an 8th grade teacher so I was prepared for that. What I wasn’t prepared for was the fact that this was a half-day job that was mistakenly entered in as a full day, so I ended up only working half the day. Actually only a couple of hours. This allowed me time to seek a half-day elsewhere, but I didn’t find one. I did find a half day for Tuesday and took it knowing that a job would be hard to find that day since most school districts had off for Veteran’s Day, but not for Monday afternoon. The mixed bag for this day was the teacher taught both mat and science. When he came back, he taught social studies. Jack of all trades here, like an elementary teacher? 😀

So next day I didn’t set my alarm as my half-day was in the afternoon. Just after six, r-i-n-g! Job assignment opened up for the morning. Cool. 8) So after quickly eating breakfast and getting ready since I had to be there in an hour, I filled in for the special-ed reading teacher at a junior high. Unlike my two periods yesterday, I had to work four periods. Breaking even I suppose. These were actually two block classes so it didn’t seem like four periods anyway. Then I was off to my afternoon assignment. Arriving there forty minutes early (it was almost down the street with a start time an hour after my end time at the other school), I sat in the lounge and had an early lunch. This assignment was pretty much like my assignment last week for two days. I met with a couple of groups of kids in the teacher’s mini-room, typical of some special ed pullout teachers, and went to help in another room later on. Well, I tried anyway- it wound up being another pullout. The last students of the day didn’t need me, so I had an extra break at the end. 🙂

Back to Wednesday.  The gym teacher was still there when I arrived, so he explained what he wanted me to do with the kids.  They started off with laps around the gym then moved into kickball.  I had 5th grade at the start, and they of course knew what they were doing.  The second class had a lot of home runs because the teacher set the bar for home runs pretty low.  At least for the older kids.  I’m sure with the younger ones the zone is fine, but with so many 5th graders kicking home runs it really needed to be set higher.  This reminds me of playing kickball outdoors when the weather is nice.  It is really different.  No walls, no ceiling, no automatic home runs, no ground rule doubles when the ball hits the basketball backboard…  Anyway, back to the present.  The second half of the morning was Kindergarten.  After they did their five laps, we practiced basic motor skills like hopping, skipping, galloping, etc before going into kickball.  From 5th to 5- quite a difference.  Now I had to teach them kickball, but they can only take in so much at once.  The real teacher will have to reteach them I’m sure, adding rules I didn’t cover.  There were a few who had played before, but to most it was a new thing.  The afternoon was quite different.  There is a student teacher in this class who was out observing another student teacher in action at another school in the morning.  In the afternoon, they swapped positions and came to this school.  Kickball struck out and the new home run was dodgeball.  Bad baseball analogy aside, it wasn’t regular dodgeball, but a variation with two medics on scooters (those square things on four wheels sat on by gym students across the nation, not a Razor if you’re wondering) who can tag their teammates who are out to get them back in.  Additionally there are pins set up at the back of either side that can be knocked over.  If all of them get knocked over, the other team wins.  During the afternoon I of course took a back seat in all of this, but when the student teacher inserted himself into the game, I just had to join the other team.  😈  Too bad I am terrible at most sports, dodgeball included, but it was a blast anyway.  I’ll have to join in more in the games on the weekends at church.

Today was 7th and 8th grade LA/Lit.  More on that tomorrow though since I will be doing the same thing.

In days of banning tag from the playground because some kids “get too rough” it seems only natural that dodge-ball is so far banned, it is even anathema to mention it. Perhaps that is really only valid in the elementary school though. Or maybe the ones making the rules don’t like the attitude of middle schoolers so they say to go ahead and bash each others’ brains out with round throwable objects. In any event dodge ball is definitely allowed in middle school, or at least some middle schools. It was probably banned a while ago before the advent of soft foam balls more commonly known as gatorskin, or rhinoskin balls, though something tells me no alligators or rhinoceroses were hurt in the making of these balls. Softer even than Nerf™ balls ever were, it would take a pretty thin head to actually get hurt by one of these balls, but yet they can still be thrown across the room or even used in a pinch for kickball.

If you haven’t figured it out by now I subbed for a PE teacher today. I actually wanted to get up a 6AM to see what was available, but I woke up at 5:30 instead, and this was the only job on the systems so it’s the one I took. Of course I didn’t mind at all since it was only a mile away too. 🙂 I probably mentioned earlier that middle school PE is one of the easier positions to sub for as the other teachers usually run the show with me helping out. Not always, but most of the time. Because there was another teacher out as well, and the field was still wet from yesterday’s two downpours, they mixed up thing a little and instead of doing softball and whatever one of the other teachers was supposed to do (health?) we all played dodge-ball instead. We divided them up into six teams and they played three-minute games, rotating between games to keep things fresh. Three grades, six PE periods, all dodge-ball. There was one period where a girl came up to me and asked if she could take attendance. I had to do a double-take as she clearly had some hormonal problem. There were patches of hair on her face. Growth that would take a guy weeks to grow, so it wasn’t just peach fuzz like on many eighth-grade boys. I just took a look at Wikipedia and it looks like it could be either androgen excess or a rare disorder called hypertrichosis (werewolf syndrome). I tried very hard not to stare at her, and felt guilty every time I so much as glanced in her direction. Of course I let her take attendance even though I was really just playing at it since I was told I didn’t need to take attendance and didn’t have a record book to take it in in any event. I just didn’t want the kids to feel they could blow off gym sometime and not be missed.

The end of the day was kind of interesting. This school schedules homeroom at the end of the day, so I was on my way up to the 8th grade classroom I was supposed to be in when I found out all the eighth-graders were on their way to the multipurpose room for an assembly. Okay then, I went there instead. They had a presentation from some Japanese-American people about World War II. I’m guessing it was put together by a teacher from one of the middle schools as she was there and she teaches world history. And she is Japanese-American. They had a video of shots taken in the WWII internment camps and then two elderly people who lived through it talked to them. It was interesting, especially as one of them after going through this decided to join a special Japanese-American infantry that was formed some time after Pearl Harbor. He did this even though he like the rest of the Japanese-Americans were treated so shabbily. He had a few reasons for doing this though other Japanese-Americans understandably refused to have any part of the not-so-good ‘ol US of A at this point in history. One reason was he had very good childhood growing up under the tutelage of several teachers who left good impressions on him. Alo he wanted to prove that not all Japanese-Americans were on the side of Japan. In reality, I think very few were on Japan’s side in this war making this whole internment camp thing a ridiculous waste of time in addition to being reprehensible. This man became a teacher himself, apparently well-regarded in the circle of Chicago’s school system. It would be eye-opening for me if I didn’t already think the whole thing was wrong. In fact, when 9/11 happened we didn’t do anything even close to this to Middle-Easterners in this country and it looks like we’re still here. I still don’t trust Islam, and many others don’t either, but there have been no more terrorist bombings in this country since so it was clearly the right choice to leave them be.