Continuing the medical theme from summer camp, enter the 2012 4th and 5th grade winter retreat held right at our church.  The older kids get to go all the way to the camp in Michigan for two days, but as a cost-saving measure for the parents I am sure, this crowd gets one night with no travel necessary outside of being brought to church.  That suits me just fine and allows more to come who otherwise would not.  I know of one family for sure whose junior-higher wasn’t going to be able to go to his retreat though his younger brother was at ours.

I arrived Friday night just a smidgen late and check-in was well underway.  In fact, most of my cabin was already settled in and watching the opening movie which entertained them while waiting for the official start.  I joined my colleagues upstairs and helped settle in the stragglers.  Did I mention that Friday was the day of a major snowstorm?  After driving on snow-packed roads from Algonquin to Elgin and back home, I and a hundred moms, dads, and other leaders slogged down the roads to make this event, the only one not canceled.  But I am sure parents would brave even more to be rid of their young-uns give their brood an opportunity to draw closer to our Lord and Savior.  Though there was one cabin that had several boys missing by the time the main event started, mine was complete (at least it was by dinner time when the last trooper arrived).  I even had a couple of repeat campers from summer, one of which I hadn’t seen since then as he attended the church’s school, but not regular church on the weekends- at least the one I serve at.  Even my junior leader was the same.  Yep, Mad Cow Disease was represented in full.  What?  Oh, yes.  Remember the medical theme I mentioned?  Well, all the cabins were named after diseases and cures.  Most girls would never go for a cabin labeled SARS or mad cow disease, so they naturally got the cures while the boys proudly represented their diseases.

Once the movie was shut off in the middle (sorry for those who may not have seen it before…) and rules had been gone over, it was time to get into things with a game of course.  That game was Duck Hunt.

No, no, no, not THAT Duck Hunt.  This was a game where the kids hunted for little rubber ducks invading the church.  By little, I mean they were only about two square inches in size each meaning not that easy to find.  But there were several hundred of them.  All through, well not the church this year though that was the original intent.  Thanks to the fresh snow, the venue was changed and the ducks were strewn all over the parking lot instead.  Think a hundred kids mining for ducks in the still-falling snow.  They had to find the ducks and bring them back to their team buckets.  Sounds tedious?  Well, add in dodgeballs thrown by zealous leaders (they had to drop any ducks they were carrying if hit, to be thrown by the leader to be buried once again, waiting on another miner) and it made for a fun time.  There were also big balls the teams had to get to their buckets for big points.

The game eventually had to end and we went in for pizza and then our first session.  As per the norm, we started off with an up-front game (we lost- I don’t think we won any of the up-front games in fact) then moved into a couple worship songs before getting into the teaching.  The theme this year was Jonah, session one was about rebellion.  As many know, Jonah rebelled against God in chapter one, not only refusing to do what Got told him, but actively going the opposite way, as far away from his responsibility as possible.  The session ended with Jonah being thrown overboard for being the cause of the storm God sent.  All sessions ended in small group time, so we went back to our cabins to discuss the application to their own lives.

Lights out and the kids were asleep instantly dreaming of peaceful things like rainbows and unicorns.  Yeah, in your dre- hey, wait a minute…  I remember a winter retreat where a couple kids ran up and down the length of the building we were in all night (or much of it).  Things weren’t that bad but we still had talking, fake flatulence, complaints about the talking and the fake flatulence…  I had to get up more than once and just stand over someone to deter further noise.  I did sleep fairly well once I nodded off, at least until 6AM, but I’ll save that for the next post.  It’s getting late.  Talking of sleeping is making me want to be there…

zzz

This of course comes from the famous South Pacific by Rodgers and Hammerstein.  However, the latter part refers to boys and their shorts (or pants).  It would seem that the older or darker the kids are, the lower the shorts.  There have been many times I have had to tell them to pull the shorts up.  Of course, just like runners in the hall continue when the teacher is out of sight, the shorts will come back down as well- I’m realistic.  But I tell ’em anyway.  I recall one black student who had his pants down past his buttocks.  He had to have a belt buckled tightly or they would have finished the journey down unhindered.  I have had another student tell me it was okay to wear his shorts so low because he was black.  But of course it isn’t just black students, but as I said older students like to do this as well, as I witness in eighth grade especially and some of the high school leaders in church.  In fact, during the camp meeting a few weeks ago the camp (and high school) director flatly said the shorts stay up or he will give them a rope to hold them up.

I have gotten softer on this lately and will usually tell them if they want to wear them low, they have to compensate with a long shirt.  Basically, as long as I can’t see what color their underwear is I’m happy.  The problem is when they sit.  The amount the shirt covers is a lot less than when they are standing, so I constantly have to say thing like, “I’m pretty sure I’m not supposed to know you are wearing red plaid underwear.”  They usually take the hint and pull them up.

This fashion I am told started in prisons, where guys would show they are “available,” if you know what I mean.  How this got out of the prisons and to our youth I have no idea, but sadly it shows why black boys tend to do it more as they are vastly over-represented (by demographics) in jail.  It can’t be comfortable.  I certainly know how uncomfortable it feels when I forget to put on a belt and my pants are just a bit loose.  I suppose they do it for the same reason adolescents do most thing adults don’t like- because the adults don’t like it (“heh, heh- I have to live in the old man’s house following his rules, so I’ll get him back by doing stuff he hates!”).

Then there are the younger boys.  Usually there is no problem with them, but today I ran into the opposite case.  I was in a very low LD class today and one of the students had his shorts pulled up as high as possible.  This is often seen on more, ah, senior men (covering up the tire- I have been tempted to do the same, which I resist by picturing what I would look like to others if I did!) but not so much on kids.  Perhaps part of what made it look odd was that the shirt was tucked in, another rare occurence among our youth.  In any event, I didn’t say anything as no one had a problem with it and at least the shorts pulled in this direction didn’t reveal what was underneath.

Another trend I’ve noticed is age affects the size or length of clothing as well.  With the girls the clothes get smaller (see this picture for an example that is sort of an analogue to this topic- it shows undergarments by year, but the outerwear by age follows the same trend…) and with the boys the shorts get longer.  Girls seem to want to reveal more as they get older (and they wonder why teenage sex is a problem) while the boys want to reveal less.  I think this was true in the eighties too.  Some I know didn’t wear shorts at all no matter the heat.  My brother was one of them.

Well, I think I will stop here.  Some of you are already wondering about me, a guy, writing about something like this.  Yes, I’m done.  Definitely done.